I recovered from Borderline Personality Disorder and so can you and the person you love!

My story is much the same as many others out there... I lost my family, and I almost lost my life, to the ravages of this illness. What's different about my story is that I now know that full recovery is possible, and I know how you can get there.

I experienced all the common symptoms of BPD including feelings of emptiness, intense episodes of despair, anger to the point of rage, impulsivity, frantic attempts to avoid abandonment, pushing people who loved me far away, suicidal thoughts and behavior, and more. I often felt raw, exhausted, and pain that was too much to bear.

My family and relationships suffered greatly, and I deeply wanted to die so the pain would stop.

I went to therapist after therapist trying to find relief. In all of that searching, I never received a correct diagnosis for what was ailing me.

When someone first suggested I might have Borderline Personality Disorder, I felt shocked and rejected the idea completely. But I learned that having BPD means we are impaired in a key area of brain function. This makes it especially hard for most people with BPD to even understand that this is what we have. Think about it. How is it possible to accurately evaluate our own brain function with the very same organ that doesn't work properly?

Even with as much distress as I was in, I didn't believe I could have BPD. Then again, people rarely arrive in therapy with a self-diagnosed personality disorder. Family and friends usually push us into trying to see it. Besides, when I read the American Psychiatric Association's nine criteria for having BPD, I just couldn't see it in myself.

Luckily for me and those who love me, questions like these helped me slowly come to accept my diagnosis. I felt tremendous relief when I finally accepted that my suffering had a name — AND A CURE! — and understood that with some work I could get better and have the life and relationships I'd always wanted.

Having Borderline Personality Disorder basically means we have a hard time managing our emotions effectively. Researchers have recently learned that BPD is much more common in the general population than ever was thought. In fact, more people have BPD than Schizophrenia and Bi-Polar Disorder combined! And yet there is very little public awareness about it. (I'm now on a crusade to change that!)

Some of us with BPD are high-functioning individuals who are highly successful in our work lives while our private lives and relationships are usually in turmoil. Often the most severe symptoms of BPD play out only with the person we are closest to. Others of us are unable to work and need financial help. As with most personality disorders, there is a spectrum of symptoms and responses.

Today, I coach people with BPD and their family members, friends and co-workers. I also speak with groups about what it feels like to have had this illness — the profound loneliness, pain, grief and shame I experienced — and about my amazing journey to recovery!

If you look around on the Internet, search results yield some pretty scary information, and misinformation. The truth is, BPD IS HIGHLY TREATABLE. I, and many others, are living proof of this. But don't take my word for it — a body of scientific research confirms it.

Whether you, or someone you love, has Borderline Personality Disorder there is HOPE! Equipped with the right information, your whole life can turn around!

You can become a happy, healthy, calm, trusting person with warm, loving, enduring relationships.

Recovery takes effort and time. The correct therapist must be found — one that specializes in proven BPD therapies such as Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), Mentalization and others, or you can find a very good cognitive behavioral therapist who specializes in treating BPD.

Whether you are someone with the diagnosis or a family member, friend, or co-worker, I can help.

If you are ready to get better, or ready to help a relative or friend get better, contact me. I will coach you through the process of recovery — finding the best and most effective treatment; finding support groups; and learning a healthy approach to managing symptoms. We'll also work on improving relationships, career issues, anything you want — and we'll get you on the road to wellness.

Visit my book section where you will find guides to such topics as daily living using DBT skills, learning how to take control of your thoughts — a concept central to healing, and much more.

I invite you to take a look at all of the information on my web site. You'll find information on helpful organizations and resources. You will also find a video of my very personal speech to clinicians, articles I've written and a video and transcript of testimony on BPD I presented to Members of Congress and their staffs.

Happy Healing! I did it. So can you!

-Tami